Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Questions with some fun

I must say, we have been getting a few more questions and looks of concern from people when they find out we are adopting. It’s comical, really. I totally appreciate people who don’t understand why we are adopting. Adoption certainly isn’t for everyone and I’m sure we have some difficult time ahead of us. Questions from people are entirely natural and actually I welcome them. It’s not like we decided overnight to adopt and didn’t think about it, pray about it, and weight the options.  So questions from friends, and even stangers are normal.  It also gives me the chance to tell about the miracle of adoption and how God can plant a seed in anyone’s heart for a child (either naturally or through adoption). . . sometimes when you least expect it.


So, with that said, here is a list of some of our latest questions. Now  -- I must make a disclaimer -- I think adoption is as very serious thing....not for everyone, not for the weak at heart... but at this point in the game, we are starting to chuckle at some of the questions we get, so please don't be offended by any of my answers or the bit of sarcasim in my tone -- it's all in good fun!  :) 

“Why would you want to do that?” (well, that’s a long story, but basically because we can – we have room in our hearts and our home for another child that has no home, and because God placed it in our hearts) 

“You know the baby will be black, right?” (Nooo…. Really? - smile, smile)

“Why don’t you just wait for grandchildren, if you like babies?” (Ummm… yeah, I just smiled at that one)

“Is this a church ‘project’?” (Uhh.. no, this isn’t a “project”, it’s a life we are talking about -- our daughter - our family)

“Isn’t that really expensive?” (First of all, how do you put a price on a life?   And, in the grand scheme of things, it’s not any more expensive than the car you drive, and our we'll have our daughter (God-willing) a lot longer than you will have your car) :)  

“Why did you pick Ethiopia?”  (another long story (you can refer to older post) but bottom line, they have the greatest need – skin color didn’t matter to us, nor the stigma that goes with children from Africa. I think in the end, Ethiopia picked us.)

“Don’t all those babies have AIDS?” (no, while it is true that many children are orphaned because of the AIDS epidemic, most of the children are safe from the disease. Others, however, are not so lucky, and there are many wonderful families that adopt these beautiful babies).

“Aren’t you afraid you are going to get a sick child?” (No, screenings are performed to the best ability that the country can do (which is sometimes minimal).   Many times some of the children are a bit malnourished and behind a bit and need some special TLC, but bottom line is there are no guarantees in any child (bio or adopted). We will get what God feels we can handle).

“Why don’t you adopt from your OWN country.” (We get this one a lot.  We don’t feel strongly either way over US adoption verses International adoption. All of these children need forever families. We did feel funny, however, creating a ‘pick me’ book for a mother to look through and pick our family for her baby, over a couple who has no biological children.  So, in the end, we decided with Ethiopia since there is such a great need, the children are confined to orphanages (not foster families), and many people pass over Ethiopia because of the stigma of disease and skin color. We just felt Ethiopia was the place and I think it was a personal choice for us.. and again, I think Ethiopia picked us).

When will you be ready to throw in the towel – i.e., get tired of waiting and just give up. (NEVER).

What do your boys think about it?  (they are thrilled beyond words and can't wait for their little sister to come home!)

My personal favorite (when someone finds out we are adopting) is the blank stare, the blink of the eyes or scrunching of the face, and then changing the subject like they didn't even comprehend what we said... makes me giggle
 
Ohhh, how I can imagine the questions once little E comes home.  It's all good though. . . I'm sure she will melt through the hearts of some of the toughest critics. 
 

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